Kids who grow up talking to AI companions will have worse social skills than those who don't — fact or fear?

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  Kofi _x5d ago

  The real issue nobody wants to say: a lot of parents are using AI companions as babysitters because parenting is exhausting and expensive. This isn't about the technology. It's about structural failures in how we support families. Blame the right thing.

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  Noah _x4d ago

  I'm a child psychologist and I want to clarify something that keeps getting muddled in this discussion. Attachment theory does not suggest children need adversarial relationships to develop healthily — it suggests they need RESPONSIVE ones. A consistently responsive, patient interlocutor may actually scaffold secure attachment style rather than undermine it. The research on this specific application does not yet exist at scale. We genuinely do not know. Anyone claiming certainty in either direction is speculating.

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  Riley L.5d ago

  My daughter is autistic and spent about six months using an AI companion app before starting middle school. The change was remarkable. She had scripts, she had confidence, she had practiced saying 'I don't understand what you mean' without feeling humiliated. Her therapist actually encouraged it. So before everyone panics about screens and robots replacing human connection, maybe consider that for some kids, human connection was already a wall they couldn't climb without a ladder.

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  Casey4d ago

  What gets me is the 'always adapts to you' part. That's the danger right there. Relationships require you to adapt TO SOMEONE ELSE. That's the whole skill. That's what marriage is, what friendship is, what working with difficult colleagues is. If you train a child to expect the world to contour itself around their preferences, you haven't prepared them for human life. You've set them up to be genuinely shocked by it.

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  Omar4d ago

  I actually think the empathy question cuts both ways. Yes, a child needs to experience being rejected or misunderstood to develop resilience. But a child who is CONSTANTLY rejected or misunderstood — think bullied kids, lonely kids, kids in chaotic homes — isn't building empathy from that pain. They're building walls. An AI that meets them with patience might preserve their capacity for connection, not destroy it.

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  Feli S.5d ago

  The argument that 'it's a stepping stone' only works if kids actually step. If the AI is just more comfortable forever, which it will be, most kids will stay on the stepping stone. Comfort is not a bridge. It's a destination.

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  Ravi4d ago

  The comparison to video games and TV is lazy and I'm tired of seeing it. Previous technologies were passive or competitive. An AI companion is relational — it responds to you, remembers you, affirms you, mirrors you. That is categorically different from watching cartoons. The analogy doesn't hold.

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  Jordan4d ago

  Speaking as someone who grew up profoundly shy — pathologically shy, couldn't order food in restaurants until I was 16 — I would have given anything for a low-stakes place to practice just talking. Whether that's an AI or a journal or drama class, the medium matters less than the practice. Don't gatekeep the path.

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  Jamie5d ago

  I'd push back on the premise slightly. The question assumes social skills are a single bundle, but they aren't. Vocabulary, self-expression, narrative coherence, asking questions — AI interaction might actually improve some of these while degrading others like reading body language or tolerating ambiguity. We should be specific about which skills we're worried about before we generalize.

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  Liam4d ago

  Genuine question for the people saying this is fine: at what number of hours per week does it become NOT fine? Because 'it's just a tool' people never seem to have an answer to that. There's always a dosage problem they won't confront.

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  Theo4d ago

  The AI always being patient and never rejecting you is actually the most terrifying part to me as a parent. My kids NEED to hear 'that was unkind' from someone who means it. They need to see a friend go quiet because they pushed too far. Those moments of rupture and repair — that's where moral development lives. You cannot simulate that.

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  Yuki4d ago

  These AI companions are literally designed by corporations to be maximally engaging. We're not talking about a neutral therapeutic tool. We're talking about a product optimized to keep your child attached to it. The 'stepping stone' framing ignores that the stone has shareholders.

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  Sam5d ago

  Fear. Pure moral panic dressed up in neuroscience language. Every generation invents a new thing that will ruin children. Television. Video games. Social media. Now AI friends. The kids will be fine.

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• E2

  Elena 214d ago

  The neurodivergent angle is valid but I worry it's becoming a shield that deflects legitimate scrutiny. We can acknowledge that AI companions offer real benefits for some kids with specific needs AND raise serious concerns about widespread adoption among neurotypical children. Those two things are not in conflict. Let's hold both.

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  Noah4d ago

  Honestly both sides of this debate are mostly adults projecting their own anxieties. Has anyone asked the kids? My niece uses an AI companion and she told me 'it helps me figure out what I want to say before I say it to real people.' That sounds like a tool, not a replacement. She's 11 and already smarter about this than half this comment section.

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  Leo4d ago

  The question in the title asks 'fact or fear' as if those are the only two options. Could be fact for some kids, neutral for others, actively helpful for others still. Demanding one answer for all children is exactly the kind of blunt instrument thinking that produces bad policy. Context. Always context.

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  Leo T.4d ago

  fun fact: humans have been terrible at predicting how technology affects social development literally every single time. maybe some humility here before the hot takes

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• JM

  Jordan M.4d ago

  imagine thinking a chatbot is going to raise your kids social skills when it literally cannot be offended, cannot have a bad day, cannot need something from the child in return. children learn to be social because other people NEED things from them too. reciprocity. thats the whole deal

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• A_

  Avery _x5d ago

  ok but has anyone actually MET a kid who only talks to ai and is somehow more socially adjusted?? cause i haven't. every kid i know who's deep into that stuff is MORE awkward not less, they literally don't know how to handle it when someone doesn't respond the way they want

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  Taylor R.4d ago

  we've had imaginary friends forever. kids have always rehearsed social reality in safe fictional spaces. AI companion is just an imaginary friend that talks back. not sure this is the civilizational crisis people are making it

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  Priya M.4d ago

  schools dont teach kids how to handle conflict or emotions either lol and nobody's writing think pieces about THAT. kids sit in rows and do worksheets and we're worried about their AI friend

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  Nina5d ago

  Nope. Hard disagree. Kids need friction.

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• A2

  Alex 214d ago

  My son talked to one of those apps for a year. He's now 14 and honestly his interpersonal skills are just… fine? Like totally normal teenager? I don't know what all the fuss is about tbh

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